I always think that when I dare to step out of my comfort zone the Universe will applaud my bravery and reward me by aligning circumstances in my favour. Alas, this time I was thrown a stinker!
Let me explain. I’ve been a follower of online marketing superstar, Marie Forleo, for some time now and when she started promoting her acclaimed B-School programme I decided I would enrol. A quick look at my cashflow, however, told me it was unlikely to happen. So I was thrilled when she announced she’d be awarding a number of scholarships for this year’s course. Applicants were required to record and submit a 90 second video of themselves, a pitch of sorts.
Shooting videos of myself and broadcasting them to the world has never been my thing, but I figured this would be a perfect opportunity to step up and challenge myself; the opportunity was just too good to pass up. So last Friday I got started, wrote my script, and proceeded to confront my self-conscious demons. After about three hours I had produced a clip that made me grin from ear to ear.
Here’s the stinker: technology! Being a novice at video selfies, I didn’t know not to film myself in portrait mode. The end result was that, after countless rehearsals, binned attempts and finally arriving at a clip that looked great on my cellphone, when I uploaded it onto my laptop I was shocked to find that it had those nasty black lines down either side.
I searched for another few hours for a solution, to no avail. I was in tears on Friday night when I realised I’d have to do it all over again. Thank goodness I had the weekend in which to recover and this morning I was feeling strong again.
But my technology woes were not over. One of my children must have been fiddling with my phone because the focal point of the video recorder had now shifted. So when I looked at the screen it looked as if I was staring into space. I spent all morning trying to fix the wayward gaze, and eventually I had to admit defeat.
The deadline for submission was this evening so I was faced with a simple choice: either submit a badly recorded video clip or forego the opportunity.
I submitted my pitch – the original one, with the nasty black lines. I was cringing when I hit the submit button. Here is a link to the clip; feel free to be kind in your feedback! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sspjoTvX5Jw&feature=youtu.be
It has felt like obstacles have been placed in my path at every step of this B-School application process. But, as yucky as this experience has been, I also appreciate that there is an upside:
- I challenged myself to step out of my comfort zone by going through with the recording.
- I came face-to-face with my insecurities and lived to tell the tale. The inner critic has been at me throughout: am I clever/articulate/attractive/witty enough for this? What if I make a fool of myself? This clip is so substandard, what will they think of me? Who cares what I have to say anyway?
Here’s the gold: Despite the stinky technology, my insecurities, the frustration and tears, I submitted the video clip. I didn’t allow my quest for perfection to stop me from giving this opportunity a shot. And for that I’m hugely chuffed!